Plugging in…
So you've either bought yourself some cool new technology, or you've moved one of your fine pieces of techno-gear to another location, or something went out for repair. What to do with all those cables and cords when you're the only one re-assembling the jumble? For most cords and cables, one can almost easily see where they belong. But not always, as witnessed more than once by YOU-KNOW-WHO-TUTOR.
A call of desperation arrived this week from someone who had just received their laptop from being repaired. All went well in the re-connection zone until the ethernet cable (the one that connects to the internet). You know the one, the ends look like phone jacks on steroids. The caller frantically described that there didn't appear to be any spot to connect this cable, though we both knew it was connected prior to being shipped off to the land of repairs. Now I know some of you don't trust repair people, or tech support people but TRUST ME, they would never take out your connections (technically called PORTS)!
After a bit more talking, the culprit showed its face: the printer cable was inadvertently placed into the ethernet connection. Why? Because it fit! Seems when we're in a hurry to put things back together, we don't see as well as we once did! Best to compare the shape AND size of what you are plugging in, to the shape AND size of where you are plugging into.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on, is it in the right spot?
Unplugged
Friday, September 28, 2007
Monday, September 3, 2007
Pussy-Footing Around
Plugging in…
This just in... cat walks across Dell laptop keyboard as writer is pressed to make deadline. Writer encourages cat to leave the area so the frantic work-pace can continue. Writer looks back at laptop screen after cat reluctantly jumps down from desk. Laptop screen is upside down - not the laptop itself, just the image on the screen. A full 180 degree turn. Panic sets in. Phone call is made to Computor Tutor. Tutor asks for a repeat of problem, laughs and responds "I've never heard that one before". Writer is dismayed but does as Tutor suggests - uses other household computer and Google to find solution. Tutor suggested it probably was a keystroke problem and was otherwise occupied and couldn't do an immediate search for said writer.
Bright writer calls back minutes later... it is a Dell keyboard "feature". Yep. Uh-huh. To make the screen do another 180 degree turn and right itself, press CTRL, ALT and up (or down) arrow. Why, the writer asked, would ANYONE want their screen image upside down??? Because it makes it easy to show someone the laptop screen who is sitting directly opposite you merely by pushing the screen almost flat, rather than turning the entire laptop around for visibility. Whew.
How incredibly weird (uncanny) that a cat could hit that exact sequence of keys while bounding across the keyboard.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on, did it have a "cat attack"?
Unplugged
This just in... cat walks across Dell laptop keyboard as writer is pressed to make deadline. Writer encourages cat to leave the area so the frantic work-pace can continue. Writer looks back at laptop screen after cat reluctantly jumps down from desk. Laptop screen is upside down - not the laptop itself, just the image on the screen. A full 180 degree turn. Panic sets in. Phone call is made to Computor Tutor. Tutor asks for a repeat of problem, laughs and responds "I've never heard that one before". Writer is dismayed but does as Tutor suggests - uses other household computer and Google to find solution. Tutor suggested it probably was a keystroke problem and was otherwise occupied and couldn't do an immediate search for said writer.
Bright writer calls back minutes later... it is a Dell keyboard "feature". Yep. Uh-huh. To make the screen do another 180 degree turn and right itself, press CTRL, ALT and up (or down) arrow. Why, the writer asked, would ANYONE want their screen image upside down??? Because it makes it easy to show someone the laptop screen who is sitting directly opposite you merely by pushing the screen almost flat, rather than turning the entire laptop around for visibility. Whew.
How incredibly weird (uncanny) that a cat could hit that exact sequence of keys while bounding across the keyboard.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on, did it have a "cat attack"?
Unplugged
Friday, August 17, 2007
Where's the Any Key?
Plugging in…
Keyboards. Typists know them well. Computer keyboards have a few extra keys, for your benefit, though that might not be terribly obvious. You know the keys I mean, F12, CTRL, Scroll Lock, Alt, Pause, Break, to name a few. Not all keyboards are alike either. Some have programmable keys to quickly access email, the Internet, or the music player. What they ALL have in common though, is the delightful "any key".
Software and hardware documentation is sometimes, shall we say, obtuse. Other times, it is clear as day. A novice learner is generally inclined to be VERY LITERAL when reading or following instructions for something that is unfamiliar to them. Herein lies the problem with the "any key". I stopped counting the times I was asked "where's the any key"? Taken literally, my clients were scouring the keyboard for a key with those exact words on it. I never felt comfortable asking a client how long they searched for it before they called and learned that "any key" literally meant press ANY KEY on the keyboard in front of you.
Admit it, you too searched for that key - one time or another, didn't you?
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
Keyboards. Typists know them well. Computer keyboards have a few extra keys, for your benefit, though that might not be terribly obvious. You know the keys I mean, F12, CTRL, Scroll Lock, Alt, Pause, Break, to name a few. Not all keyboards are alike either. Some have programmable keys to quickly access email, the Internet, or the music player. What they ALL have in common though, is the delightful "any key".
Software and hardware documentation is sometimes, shall we say, obtuse. Other times, it is clear as day. A novice learner is generally inclined to be VERY LITERAL when reading or following instructions for something that is unfamiliar to them. Herein lies the problem with the "any key". I stopped counting the times I was asked "where's the any key"? Taken literally, my clients were scouring the keyboard for a key with those exact words on it. I never felt comfortable asking a client how long they searched for it before they called and learned that "any key" literally meant press ANY KEY on the keyboard in front of you.
Admit it, you too searched for that key - one time or another, didn't you?
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
Really Safe Computing
Plugging in…
I completely forgot about this little ditty until a friend recently reminded me of it. The Tutor was tutoring a large group of sales people from a well-known athletic shoe manufacturer. This was in the early days of computing, when floppy disks ruled the storage roosts. During a discussion about sharing files, the topic of computer viruses arose. One young man raised his hand and asked if the plastic case the 3.5" floppy disk was stored in, was enough protection to keep a virus out of a computer.
When the general laughter from his colleagues finally stopped, I answered, as seriously as I could, that NO, the plastic sleeve was not considered a computer condom, just a sleeve to protect from dirt and dust. I was adamant that one must remove the floppy disk from the sleeve before inserting it into the floppy disk drive.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on, is it safe?
Unplugged
I completely forgot about this little ditty until a friend recently reminded me of it. The Tutor was tutoring a large group of sales people from a well-known athletic shoe manufacturer. This was in the early days of computing, when floppy disks ruled the storage roosts. During a discussion about sharing files, the topic of computer viruses arose. One young man raised his hand and asked if the plastic case the 3.5" floppy disk was stored in, was enough protection to keep a virus out of a computer.
When the general laughter from his colleagues finally stopped, I answered, as seriously as I could, that NO, the plastic sleeve was not considered a computer condom, just a sleeve to protect from dirt and dust. I was adamant that one must remove the floppy disk from the sleeve before inserting it into the floppy disk drive.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on, is it safe?
Unplugged
Friday, August 3, 2007
Just the Fax, Mam
Plugging in…
So what happens to your fax/modem when you ditch the land-line and go full blown cellular? Nothing happens, which is exactly what happened to a client just this week.
The land-line was disconnected through the phone company, but no one thought to unplug the phone cord from the phone jack leading from the phone jack to the all-in-one printer. Never had the fax failed before, so the unsuspecting user was quite put out when a time-sensitve document needed to be faxed immediately.
Everything "looked" correct, things were all plugged in and turned on. Almost. I got the frantic phone call. And I remembered the recent disconnection of the land-line. A fax machine must be connected to a live line. Period. End of discussion. My client? Took the document to a local business and asked to use their fax machine.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on, is it a live phone line?
Unplugged
So what happens to your fax/modem when you ditch the land-line and go full blown cellular? Nothing happens, which is exactly what happened to a client just this week.
The land-line was disconnected through the phone company, but no one thought to unplug the phone cord from the phone jack leading from the phone jack to the all-in-one printer. Never had the fax failed before, so the unsuspecting user was quite put out when a time-sensitve document needed to be faxed immediately.
Everything "looked" correct, things were all plugged in and turned on. Almost. I got the frantic phone call. And I remembered the recent disconnection of the land-line. A fax machine must be connected to a live line. Period. End of discussion. My client? Took the document to a local business and asked to use their fax machine.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on, is it a live phone line?
Unplugged
Thursday, June 28, 2007
This Side Down
Plugging in…
Inkjet printers have brought the production of photographs to the masses. Or have they?
Ink is expensive and one doesn’t get much ink mileage from a cartridge (you think gasoline is expensive?) Photo paper is expensive and myriad choices confound the buyer. Fiddling with the digital image takes time, and knowledge. By the time one manages to print one 5 x 7 gotta-have photo, it has cost about an hour of valuable time.
So you’ve figured out how to print more quickly – education is a wonderful thing. Now, why, oh why is that photo so blurred and why won’t the ink dry in seconds, like the instructions said it would?
“What happened” lamented a client of mine, who had printed photos many times before? Panic set in – was the printer failing, was the ink compromised, did the paper lose its sheen?
Operator error – the photo paper was placed in the paper feeder, glossy side up. With normal, bond paper, it doesn’t have a “preferred” side; some inkjet printers require the paper glossy side up, some glossy side down. Some photo papers (matte finish) are difficult to see which side is the printable side. When all was said and done, that beautiful 8 x 10 photo cost just under $ 100 to print. And, no, it wasn’t being entered in a contest, not being framed for a showing, not being submitted to a newspaper to accompany a potential Pulitzer Prize article. My client just wanted to print the photo to see it.
Once you’ve printed a hundred dollar photo, you’ll never forget to check the paper before putting it into the printer again.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on, is it right-side down?
Unplugged
Inkjet printers have brought the production of photographs to the masses. Or have they?
Ink is expensive and one doesn’t get much ink mileage from a cartridge (you think gasoline is expensive?) Photo paper is expensive and myriad choices confound the buyer. Fiddling with the digital image takes time, and knowledge. By the time one manages to print one 5 x 7 gotta-have photo, it has cost about an hour of valuable time.
So you’ve figured out how to print more quickly – education is a wonderful thing. Now, why, oh why is that photo so blurred and why won’t the ink dry in seconds, like the instructions said it would?
“What happened” lamented a client of mine, who had printed photos many times before? Panic set in – was the printer failing, was the ink compromised, did the paper lose its sheen?
Operator error – the photo paper was placed in the paper feeder, glossy side up. With normal, bond paper, it doesn’t have a “preferred” side; some inkjet printers require the paper glossy side up, some glossy side down. Some photo papers (matte finish) are difficult to see which side is the printable side. When all was said and done, that beautiful 8 x 10 photo cost just under $ 100 to print. And, no, it wasn’t being entered in a contest, not being framed for a showing, not being submitted to a newspaper to accompany a potential Pulitzer Prize article. My client just wanted to print the photo to see it.
Once you’ve printed a hundred dollar photo, you’ll never forget to check the paper before putting it into the printer again.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on, is it right-side down?
Unplugged
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
No One Makes This Stuff Up
Plugging in…
I spent an entire day, a full eight hours working with a client who had purchased new computers and needed assistance with file transfers, printer driver installations, internet and email account setups and a host of other computer-related tasks. By the time I left him and his office, all the computers were running perfectly; internet and email tested and on-line, all files transferred and printers humming with output. So I left. Drove home. Ate some dinner. Answered the business phone around 8:00pm the same evening.
Guess who was on the line? None other than the client I had just spent the entire day with. His only words to me were: “My computer fell, from a great distance. Don’t ask me how”. Inquiring minds need to know. Of course I asked how. Things were just fine at the office, until he left the office. He decided to take one of the new desktop computers home to replace an aging one in his home office. Pretty simple really. Turn off, unplug, put in car, drive home… he got stuck at the put in car stage. He positioned the desktop computer (not the monitor) on the roof of his car while he fiddled with the keys to open the car door. That is how the computer came to fall “from a great distance”. Trust me; no one makes this stuff up. Needless to say, there wasn’t anything I could do to resuscitate the poor computer. Dead as a door nail, like old Jacob Marley.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
I spent an entire day, a full eight hours working with a client who had purchased new computers and needed assistance with file transfers, printer driver installations, internet and email account setups and a host of other computer-related tasks. By the time I left him and his office, all the computers were running perfectly; internet and email tested and on-line, all files transferred and printers humming with output. So I left. Drove home. Ate some dinner. Answered the business phone around 8:00pm the same evening.
Guess who was on the line? None other than the client I had just spent the entire day with. His only words to me were: “My computer fell, from a great distance. Don’t ask me how”. Inquiring minds need to know. Of course I asked how. Things were just fine at the office, until he left the office. He decided to take one of the new desktop computers home to replace an aging one in his home office. Pretty simple really. Turn off, unplug, put in car, drive home… he got stuck at the put in car stage. He positioned the desktop computer (not the monitor) on the roof of his car while he fiddled with the keys to open the car door. That is how the computer came to fall “from a great distance”. Trust me; no one makes this stuff up. Needless to say, there wasn’t anything I could do to resuscitate the poor computer. Dead as a door nail, like old Jacob Marley.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
RTFM
Plugging in...
RTFM = Read the F$@#$ Manual
When I worked in the technical support arena, it was a phrase, said in jest, when someone called with a tech support question we knew was answered in the manual. Since the bulk of the general computing public never cracked the shrink wrap on the manuals, the industry responded with a cost-cutting measure of producing the manuals on CDs or DVDs. See? We really are our own worst enemies. At one time, staffs of technical writers were busy producing the manuals for all the software and hardware vendors. Many of the manuals did get used - people put them under their monitors to raise them up; they acted as book-ends on book shelves and some became booster seats for children. Some just collected dust. No kidding.
Fast forward ten years or so and the paper-style manuals are thin, but contain valuable information. Information such as if you want The Computor Tutor to help you with that new smart phone, PDA (personal digital assistant: Palm Pilot) or camera, they MUST be charged before she arrives, and not just an hour before. Where do you think that tid-bit of knowledge comes from? Yes siree - that slim booklet inside the plastic packaging.
So yes, I have arrived at several clients only to inform them that the electronic device we were going to work with, needs hours of charging or sometimes an overnight charge before we can even turn it on. That's after I had to wrestle with the stubborn plastic packaging and extricate the all imporant piece of paper that said "CHARGE ME FIRST". Reading. It's fundamental.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
RTFM = Read the F$@#$ Manual
When I worked in the technical support arena, it was a phrase, said in jest, when someone called with a tech support question we knew was answered in the manual. Since the bulk of the general computing public never cracked the shrink wrap on the manuals, the industry responded with a cost-cutting measure of producing the manuals on CDs or DVDs. See? We really are our own worst enemies. At one time, staffs of technical writers were busy producing the manuals for all the software and hardware vendors. Many of the manuals did get used - people put them under their monitors to raise them up; they acted as book-ends on book shelves and some became booster seats for children. Some just collected dust. No kidding.
Fast forward ten years or so and the paper-style manuals are thin, but contain valuable information. Information such as if you want The Computor Tutor to help you with that new smart phone, PDA (personal digital assistant: Palm Pilot) or camera, they MUST be charged before she arrives, and not just an hour before. Where do you think that tid-bit of knowledge comes from? Yes siree - that slim booklet inside the plastic packaging.
So yes, I have arrived at several clients only to inform them that the electronic device we were going to work with, needs hours of charging or sometimes an overnight charge before we can even turn it on. That's after I had to wrestle with the stubborn plastic packaging and extricate the all imporant piece of paper that said "CHARGE ME FIRST". Reading. It's fundamental.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
A Digital Duh
Plugging in...
How many of us have done something like this?
A digital camera is such a wonderful creation. No film to worry about. Take as many photos as you want, view, delete, take again. Take hundreds more! Document your way through life. Absolute instant gratification, almost like an ATM machine. Some digital cameras also take video clips; some of the hybrids can shoot 60 minutes or more of live video.
I was called upon to assist a client who had taken some video footage of her daughter and wanted to transfer it from the camera to the computer so it could be shared with the world. Not really, just the family and ALL the daughter’s friends. This was LONG before utube existed. Taking pictures and video are very easy – most people don’t even crack the camera’s manual before they become expert shooters.
My first course of action is always to talk first – I ask many questions before I take over and begin troubleshooting. I listened well to my client, asked for the camera’s instruction manual and checked out the camera from stem to stern. Now being very familiar with the camera, I proceeded to follow the camera’s instructions to transfer the video footage. Oops – instructions were as clear as day and would have worked perfectly. If. Only. If only my client had loaded the “digital film” into the camera before she took the camera on its maiden video shoot. No film, no footage, no fun, no fair. She did put in the batteries and it was fully charged. No consolation.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on? And in this case, is the ¨digital film¨ card inside?
Unplugged
How many of us have done something like this?
A digital camera is such a wonderful creation. No film to worry about. Take as many photos as you want, view, delete, take again. Take hundreds more! Document your way through life. Absolute instant gratification, almost like an ATM machine. Some digital cameras also take video clips; some of the hybrids can shoot 60 minutes or more of live video.
I was called upon to assist a client who had taken some video footage of her daughter and wanted to transfer it from the camera to the computer so it could be shared with the world. Not really, just the family and ALL the daughter’s friends. This was LONG before utube existed. Taking pictures and video are very easy – most people don’t even crack the camera’s manual before they become expert shooters.
My first course of action is always to talk first – I ask many questions before I take over and begin troubleshooting. I listened well to my client, asked for the camera’s instruction manual and checked out the camera from stem to stern. Now being very familiar with the camera, I proceeded to follow the camera’s instructions to transfer the video footage. Oops – instructions were as clear as day and would have worked perfectly. If. Only. If only my client had loaded the “digital film” into the camera before she took the camera on its maiden video shoot. No film, no footage, no fun, no fair. She did put in the batteries and it was fully charged. No consolation.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on? And in this case, is the ¨digital film¨ card inside?
Unplugged
Here Kitty, Kitty
Plugging in...
I know how dearly pet owners LOVE their animals. My sister has two children, Sophie and Murray – both cats, who are deeply embedded in the daily lives of her and her significant other. I have nothing against pets, but I take great issue with where they are allowed to roam and roost.
Twice I was contacted by the same client to remove the “hair balls” that were causing her printer to sputter and choke – just like an animal does. First time, shame on the kitty, second time shame on the client. The solution wasn’t to prohibit the cat from entering the office, nor was it an issue of training the cat to park her purr-fect self on something else. I suggested a simple, inexpensive solution. Put a plastic dust cover or terry cloth towel over the printer. Really. That's it, that's all but it took TWO visits and TWO checks made out to yours truly to get the printer covered!
By the time I was paid to untangle the hair-balls inside the printer [twice], my client could have purchased a new printer, had the cat all gussied up at the groomers or gone out for some fine dining. Tis not for me to decide how a client spends their money… I was happy to apply the correct “printer conditioner” to de-tangle and remove the errant hairs. Don’t tell anyone in the cosmetology field that I’m working on hair without a license.
I know how dearly pet owners LOVE their animals. My sister has two children, Sophie and Murray – both cats, who are deeply embedded in the daily lives of her and her significant other. I have nothing against pets, but I take great issue with where they are allowed to roam and roost.
Twice I was contacted by the same client to remove the “hair balls” that were causing her printer to sputter and choke – just like an animal does. First time, shame on the kitty, second time shame on the client. The solution wasn’t to prohibit the cat from entering the office, nor was it an issue of training the cat to park her purr-fect self on something else. I suggested a simple, inexpensive solution. Put a plastic dust cover or terry cloth towel over the printer. Really. That's it, that's all but it took TWO visits and TWO checks made out to yours truly to get the printer covered!
By the time I was paid to untangle the hair-balls inside the printer [twice], my client could have purchased a new printer, had the cat all gussied up at the groomers or gone out for some fine dining. Tis not for me to decide how a client spends their money… I was happy to apply the correct “printer conditioner” to de-tangle and remove the errant hairs. Don’t tell anyone in the cosmetology field that I’m working on hair without a license.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Better Than Massage Therapy
Plugging in...
This the Tutor was told by a long-time client just yesterday, May 30, 2007. The Tutor spent two hours working on fixing a Treo phone to sync properly with Outlook using Microsoft's Active Sync software, followed by using Outlook categories to create a specialized folder for merging with Word to print mailing labels for an annual newsletter, diagnosed why the internet-based Mozy backup couldn’t connect and perform the backup, changed Mozy’s settings to a daily backup schedule, changed the resolution on the digital camera to produce web-friendly sized photos and demonstrated how to reduce the file size of a digital picture already stored on the computer. Whew.
As the Tutor gathered the tools (really just the brain), the client let out a deep breath and stated “now that was better than a massage, I feel so much better now”. The Tutor laughed, flattered. Mind, body, computer. Who knew?
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
This the Tutor was told by a long-time client just yesterday, May 30, 2007. The Tutor spent two hours working on fixing a Treo phone to sync properly with Outlook using Microsoft's Active Sync software, followed by using Outlook categories to create a specialized folder for merging with Word to print mailing labels for an annual newsletter, diagnosed why the internet-based Mozy backup couldn’t connect and perform the backup, changed Mozy’s settings to a daily backup schedule, changed the resolution on the digital camera to produce web-friendly sized photos and demonstrated how to reduce the file size of a digital picture already stored on the computer. Whew.
As the Tutor gathered the tools (really just the brain), the client let out a deep breath and stated “now that was better than a massage, I feel so much better now”. The Tutor laughed, flattered. Mind, body, computer. Who knew?
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Unplugged
Plugging in...
Tutor caveat: when a client calls with an inoperable device (computer, camera, scanner, laptop, phone, ipod), the Tutor always ask “is it plugged in, is it turned on, is it charged” before making a house call. It is distressing for both the Tutor and the Tut-ee to realize the ONLY problem is a power source problem. The Tutor still must charge for the time to make the house call and the knowledge to look at the power sources; the Tut-ee is grateful the problem is small and quickly fixed but also chagrined that they didn’t check every power source before calling in the “professional”.
In fairness to all power-challenged people, some devices have multiple cords that connect together; some have batteries, some have infra-red connections that are out of line, some have secondary devices that require a button to be pressed to be activated, some have switches on the wall to turn the power on, some are “dead” outlets, some are connected to power strips, that although plugged in, are in fact not turned on.
So for all of you out there who had to write a check to have someone plug something in for them: POWER to the people!
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
Tutor caveat: when a client calls with an inoperable device (computer, camera, scanner, laptop, phone, ipod), the Tutor always ask “is it plugged in, is it turned on, is it charged” before making a house call. It is distressing for both the Tutor and the Tut-ee to realize the ONLY problem is a power source problem. The Tutor still must charge for the time to make the house call and the knowledge to look at the power sources; the Tut-ee is grateful the problem is small and quickly fixed but also chagrined that they didn’t check every power source before calling in the “professional”.
In fairness to all power-challenged people, some devices have multiple cords that connect together; some have batteries, some have infra-red connections that are out of line, some have secondary devices that require a button to be pressed to be activated, some have switches on the wall to turn the power on, some are “dead” outlets, some are connected to power strips, that although plugged in, are in fact not turned on.
So for all of you out there who had to write a check to have someone plug something in for them: POWER to the people!
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Animal Tails
Plugging in...
I’m perfectly happy to work on someone’s home computer – alone. Sometimes our schedules don’t click and I am trusted to be at their home, unaccompanied. Except for maybe the rogue cockatiel, dog or ferret.
Not being a current pet owner, I’m uncertain how much run of the house a pet is given while the owner’s are away. I found out at one house just how much leeway the precious pets had.
I was working on a young man’s computer, the son of a client, who had an entire floor to himself for his bedroom. Envious? Me too. So there I sat, focused solely on the project at hand, eradicating a virus, installing a new printer, doing some system maintenance. I’d worked on this computer before, so I was aware of the pets in the household and in particular, the birdcage in this room. The bird cage door was not closed, nor was the bird in it. Mr. Bird was peering at me from across the room. And for awhile I was left alone. For some reason, the bird decided I’d overstayed my welcome and proceeded to repeatedly dive bomb my head. Though it was annoying, I held my ground and after several flight patterns, Mr. Bird went back to peering at me from the top of the cage.
Safe. Good, I still had more work to do. Focusing once again, both hands now free from swatting a flapping bird at my head, I continued. It wasn’t long before I felt the weirdest little tug at my pant leg. My attention was quickly diverted, but not before the dang ferret crawled up inside my pant leg! I knew the young man owned a ferret, I didn’t know that it was loose and in the room with me. The little guy didn’t make a peep when I came into the room, or when I cursed the dive-bombing cockatiel. No, he waited for his own, personal chance to assault an unsuspecting stranger. They are cute, but I still had work to do.
He finally stopped crawling all over me, inside the pant leg, across my shoulders, on my lap, across the keyboard. He eventually gave up and sat on the bed behind me. If a dive-bombing bird couldn’t stop me, a wandering ferret didn’t stand a chance.
I finished my work, success on all fronts. I packed up my tutoring tools and thought I was going to walk down the stairs, close the door and go on to the next tutoring job. But nooooo. Ferrets are fast, and they are playful. The ferret kept racing me down the stairs, sitting in front of the door. That door, I knew, needed to be closed because, yep – you guessed it – more pets on the floor below. Two dogs. The two dogs and the ferret were not the best of friends. I lost count how many times I grabbed the ferret, walked back upstairs and attempted to run down the stairs before you-know-who got there first. Clearly I had to do something else. I grabbed the ferret one more time and brought him back upstairs. I put him in the spare bed, under the covers, where I knew he liked to hide (don’t ask how I knew this). I “tucked” him in and ran like crazy down the stairs and slammed the door. I laughed like a dope behind the door, caught my breath and left through the front door, dignity intact, no bird droppings in my hair and no ferret attached to my leg.
Yes, I got paid for all this, no extra charge for the entertainment.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
I’m perfectly happy to work on someone’s home computer – alone. Sometimes our schedules don’t click and I am trusted to be at their home, unaccompanied. Except for maybe the rogue cockatiel, dog or ferret.
Not being a current pet owner, I’m uncertain how much run of the house a pet is given while the owner’s are away. I found out at one house just how much leeway the precious pets had.
I was working on a young man’s computer, the son of a client, who had an entire floor to himself for his bedroom. Envious? Me too. So there I sat, focused solely on the project at hand, eradicating a virus, installing a new printer, doing some system maintenance. I’d worked on this computer before, so I was aware of the pets in the household and in particular, the birdcage in this room. The bird cage door was not closed, nor was the bird in it. Mr. Bird was peering at me from across the room. And for awhile I was left alone. For some reason, the bird decided I’d overstayed my welcome and proceeded to repeatedly dive bomb my head. Though it was annoying, I held my ground and after several flight patterns, Mr. Bird went back to peering at me from the top of the cage.
Safe. Good, I still had more work to do. Focusing once again, both hands now free from swatting a flapping bird at my head, I continued. It wasn’t long before I felt the weirdest little tug at my pant leg. My attention was quickly diverted, but not before the dang ferret crawled up inside my pant leg! I knew the young man owned a ferret, I didn’t know that it was loose and in the room with me. The little guy didn’t make a peep when I came into the room, or when I cursed the dive-bombing cockatiel. No, he waited for his own, personal chance to assault an unsuspecting stranger. They are cute, but I still had work to do.
He finally stopped crawling all over me, inside the pant leg, across my shoulders, on my lap, across the keyboard. He eventually gave up and sat on the bed behind me. If a dive-bombing bird couldn’t stop me, a wandering ferret didn’t stand a chance.
I finished my work, success on all fronts. I packed up my tutoring tools and thought I was going to walk down the stairs, close the door and go on to the next tutoring job. But nooooo. Ferrets are fast, and they are playful. The ferret kept racing me down the stairs, sitting in front of the door. That door, I knew, needed to be closed because, yep – you guessed it – more pets on the floor below. Two dogs. The two dogs and the ferret were not the best of friends. I lost count how many times I grabbed the ferret, walked back upstairs and attempted to run down the stairs before you-know-who got there first. Clearly I had to do something else. I grabbed the ferret one more time and brought him back upstairs. I put him in the spare bed, under the covers, where I knew he liked to hide (don’t ask how I knew this). I “tucked” him in and ran like crazy down the stairs and slammed the door. I laughed like a dope behind the door, caught my breath and left through the front door, dignity intact, no bird droppings in my hair and no ferret attached to my leg.
Yes, I got paid for all this, no extra charge for the entertainment.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Multi-Generational
Plugging in...
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
Tutoring does not age discriminate. It certainly does challenge.
The oldest client to date was a retired lawyer of 94. I did not transpose the numbers (he was not 49). Did he have some challenges? Sure. Did the Tutor? Yes. Every client teaches me how to tutor better. I'm sure you're very curious what he wanted tutoring in, yes? His word processor of choice: Word Perfect for DOS. (That should tell you this was some time ago we worked together.) When he was given a newer computer, ALL his shortcuts and customized options for Word Perfect didn't make it to the new computer. He couldn't remember what they were, a backup didn't exist and the Tutor didn't know what he didn't know. But we persevered and painstakingly put together a workable group of shortcuts that were also documented on paper and he went happily about his word processing. He needed each shortcut written on an index card, which he filed in a box next to his computer. He was an intelligent man, and at 94 knew he needed some memory enhancers and wasn't afraid to ask for them.
The youngest client to date was a boy of 9 who refused to use a pencil or pen to write. Aside from this one idiosyncrasy, he was a normal child. No, really, he was. He already had a computer and was very literate in its use, including knowledge of the keyboard. Watch most children on a computer, they have little trouble mousing around, even if they can't read! They learn quicker because they don't know that every action has a consequence. Plus, they don't have to pay the computer repair person, do they?
So what was the Tutor's role in this tale? The Tutor was hired to buy and install a typing tutor software program, and to tutor him in correctly using his word processor. Think 9 years old. Think short attention span. He no more wanted to learn using his word processor than he wanted to go to bed early. He wanted to show me drawings, talk about his swimming, anything but do what the Tutor was hired to do. To work with someone this young required compromising. The Tutor had to talk about dinosaurs and the young lad had to write about what he did on his summer vacation. We worked it out - some fun, some work. Balance. It's always about balance.
The oldest client to date was a retired lawyer of 94. I did not transpose the numbers (he was not 49). Did he have some challenges? Sure. Did the Tutor? Yes. Every client teaches me how to tutor better. I'm sure you're very curious what he wanted tutoring in, yes? His word processor of choice: Word Perfect for DOS. (That should tell you this was some time ago we worked together.) When he was given a newer computer, ALL his shortcuts and customized options for Word Perfect didn't make it to the new computer. He couldn't remember what they were, a backup didn't exist and the Tutor didn't know what he didn't know. But we persevered and painstakingly put together a workable group of shortcuts that were also documented on paper and he went happily about his word processing. He needed each shortcut written on an index card, which he filed in a box next to his computer. He was an intelligent man, and at 94 knew he needed some memory enhancers and wasn't afraid to ask for them.
The youngest client to date was a boy of 9 who refused to use a pencil or pen to write. Aside from this one idiosyncrasy, he was a normal child. No, really, he was. He already had a computer and was very literate in its use, including knowledge of the keyboard. Watch most children on a computer, they have little trouble mousing around, even if they can't read! They learn quicker because they don't know that every action has a consequence. Plus, they don't have to pay the computer repair person, do they?
So what was the Tutor's role in this tale? The Tutor was hired to buy and install a typing tutor software program, and to tutor him in correctly using his word processor. Think 9 years old. Think short attention span. He no more wanted to learn using his word processor than he wanted to go to bed early. He wanted to show me drawings, talk about his swimming, anything but do what the Tutor was hired to do. To work with someone this young required compromising. The Tutor had to talk about dinosaurs and the young lad had to write about what he did on his summer vacation. We worked it out - some fun, some work. Balance. It's always about balance.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
Mistakes Happen
Plugging in...
Oh yes. And a biggie, too. It was more the lack of tutoring that got the tutor into trouble. Call it a scheduling snafu. One client, an educational institution who books classroom training regularly, called to cancel a workshop. In my haste, I did not notice the TWO days of training this client had scheduled.
Perhaps what happened is obvious? NO? I canceled the wrong DATE! (That's why cancellations are NO LONGER taken over the telephone). This left 18 people sitting in a classroom wondering what in the world happened to the always punctual tutor.
To say I was mortified is an understatement. I re-scheduled the class at no charge. I had wasted 3 hours of 18 people's time. Doing the math: I owed 54 hours of time to the group. I must admit, they were incredibly forgiving, gracious, and still work with me today.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
Oh yes. And a biggie, too. It was more the lack of tutoring that got the tutor into trouble. Call it a scheduling snafu. One client, an educational institution who books classroom training regularly, called to cancel a workshop. In my haste, I did not notice the TWO days of training this client had scheduled.
Perhaps what happened is obvious? NO? I canceled the wrong DATE! (That's why cancellations are NO LONGER taken over the telephone). This left 18 people sitting in a classroom wondering what in the world happened to the always punctual tutor.
To say I was mortified is an understatement. I re-scheduled the class at no charge. I had wasted 3 hours of 18 people's time. Doing the math: I owed 54 hours of time to the group. I must admit, they were incredibly forgiving, gracious, and still work with me today.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
Saturday, May 19, 2007
12:00 Blinking
Plugging in...
So you know I'm a computor tutor. And yes, I spell computer, COMPUTOR, because it looks better with TUTOR. No, the Tutor doesn't need a spellchecker either. My spell checker has that word added to it so it doesn't think it's an error. But I digress from the telling of the tale.
The tale. An electronics tale. Does the Tutor look like an electronics technician? A geek from the world of Tweeter who can lay 50 feet of cable in a single bound? A plasma HD TV expert who knows why the gold tipped cables are the best to use? It must be the aura of confidence exuded upon the Tutor's arrival, for why else would a client, a computor tutor client, ask the tutor if I could program their VCR to stop blinking 12:00?
Did the Tutor fix it? Of course. The Tutor also opens boxes, puts paper in copy machines, makes coffee, programs thermostats, and even "does Windows" - but you probably knew that one, right?
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
So you know I'm a computor tutor. And yes, I spell computer, COMPUTOR, because it looks better with TUTOR. No, the Tutor doesn't need a spellchecker either. My spell checker has that word added to it so it doesn't think it's an error. But I digress from the telling of the tale.
The tale. An electronics tale. Does the Tutor look like an electronics technician? A geek from the world of Tweeter who can lay 50 feet of cable in a single bound? A plasma HD TV expert who knows why the gold tipped cables are the best to use? It must be the aura of confidence exuded upon the Tutor's arrival, for why else would a client, a computor tutor client, ask the tutor if I could program their VCR to stop blinking 12:00?
Did the Tutor fix it? Of course. The Tutor also opens boxes, puts paper in copy machines, makes coffee, programs thermostats, and even "does Windows" - but you probably knew that one, right?
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
Auto De-Tales
Plugging in...
Computor Tutor-ing is generally not an amusing vocation. Helfpul? Yes. Educational? Yes. Surprising? Yes. Laugh out loud funny? Not usually. OK. Sometimes, but never in a hurtful way. Unusual? All the time.
This tale, as most will be, is short and as most do, has a happy ending.
What do you say when a client tells you that their child has stuffed a favorite, prized even, matchbox car into the tape backup unit on the computer? And of course it won't come out. Not with praying, banging, tipping upside down, or throwing a complete hissy-fit.
How much is a little matchbox car worth, exactly? Apparently enough to pay a considerable amount of money to watch the tutor use surgeon-like precision when operating on the computer and the tape drive unit - both of which made a full recovery; the matchbox was retrieved unscathed. I'd like to think it was later sold on eBay to pay for the "operation".
Tell me, where do you go to school to learn the fine art of extracting alien articles from inside computers?
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
Computor Tutor-ing is generally not an amusing vocation. Helfpul? Yes. Educational? Yes. Surprising? Yes. Laugh out loud funny? Not usually. OK. Sometimes, but never in a hurtful way. Unusual? All the time.
This tale, as most will be, is short and as most do, has a happy ending.
What do you say when a client tells you that their child has stuffed a favorite, prized even, matchbox car into the tape backup unit on the computer? And of course it won't come out. Not with praying, banging, tipping upside down, or throwing a complete hissy-fit.
How much is a little matchbox car worth, exactly? Apparently enough to pay a considerable amount of money to watch the tutor use surgeon-like precision when operating on the computer and the tape drive unit - both of which made a full recovery; the matchbox was retrieved unscathed. I'd like to think it was later sold on eBay to pay for the "operation".
Tell me, where do you go to school to learn the fine art of extracting alien articles from inside computers?
ALWAYS REMEMBER: before calling for help - is it plugged in, is it turned on?
Unplugged
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